Crack Fairytales - The Wurst Prince

And so we have heard the story of the Tomato Prince Antonio and the Pasta Princess Lovino... but what of the younger princess, Feliciano? Well, dear reader, fear not for that story is about to come.


As usual, this story takes place once upon a time in a land far away. The Pasta Kingdom had been allied with the Wurst Kingdom for quite some time. The Pasta Kingdom would always turn to their friends whenever they found themselves in danger. The Pasta King and the Wurst King knew each other from their childhood so it was fairly obvious why their kingdoms were allied.


But I'm going off the subject again, for this story is about the youngest Princess, Feliciano.


Feliciano Vargas, Princess of the Pasta kingdom was a happy, bubbly young man with a good heart. He was nice to everyone he met though when faced with danger he was always the first to run away. The Pasta King was worried, for he had to decide whether Feliciano or his brother Lovino should take the throne after his passing. Both princesses were cowardly and easily frightened, but Lovino had a very short temper and Feliciano... he was rather spacey. The King decided that neither of his princesses would be suitable of ruling his kingdom.... at least not alone.


And so the match making began.


He attempted to set his princesses up with many princes. Said princes travelled far and wide but neither of his princesses liked them. Lovino didn't pay them any attention and would curse and snap coldly whenever someone tried to make conversation with him and Feliciano just politely declined their advances. The Pasta King was weary, but he had to find his princesses a suitor, for the good of the kingdom.


Then he was thrown a life-line. He received a letter from the Wurst King stating that his princes were yet to be married and perhaps there would be a chance that one of them would find one of the Pasta Princesses a good suitor. The Pasta King was relieved and replied to the Wurst King immediately for him to send his princes to the kingdom and then fate should decide.


And little over a week later, the princes arrived. The oldest was Gilbert; he was a handsome young man with silvery hair and ruby red eyes. He wore an obnoxious smirk and stated he was the 'most awesome of them all' and that he should succeed in wooing one of the Princesses. The youngest Prince was not as loud as his brother. He was tall and broad with baby blue eyes and slicked back blond hair.


As soon as he laid eyes on the two Princes, Lovino decided that he wanted absolutely nothing to do with them. He called them both 'potato bastards' and stormed away. The King knew that there was no changing the older Princess's mind so the only thing left to do was see which one of the Princes Feliciano preferred. He could see that the two Princes were already besotted with him, though Gilbert was more obvious about this than his brother.


The King smiled to himself; he would just have to wait and see what happens.


Over the next couple of days, Feliciano was showered with affection from the oldest brother Gilbert. He claimed to be the awesome Prince who could save Feliciano from anything and that the Princess would make an awesome Queen for him when he became King. Feliciano was flattered by the affection he was receiving but the albino Prince was not who he wanted.


Whenever the youngest brother Ludwig spoke to him, Feliciano found that his cheeks turned pink and his heart beat would increase. His palms would become sweaty from the nervousness and he found it difficult to not say something completely ridiculous (but then again, when did he not have that problem?). Gilbert continued to fight for the younger Princess's affection but he soon came to realise that his heart belonged to his brother. Gilbert tried his luck with the oldest Princess and needless to say he left with a bloody nose and a black eye.


As time went by, Feliciano and Ludwig became closer and closer until the Princess realised that he may have fallen in love with the Prince. It was easy to see why; Ludwig was beautiful in every single way imaginable. Feliciano found that beneath his gruff exterior there was a kind and gentle man just waiting to be discovered and the young Princess soon came to realise that this softer side of the Prince was only revealed around him. They began to know each other better; Feliciano picked up on the small things such as the tiny smiles Ludwig displayed when they were alone, or when they were walking their hands would touch momentarily.


Feliciano had fallen, and he had fallen hard.


Needless to say, the same could be said about the Prince. He confided in his brother- he told him the moment he laid eyes on Feliciano he knew that he wanted to marry him. Of course, Gilbert was disappointed that he had lost out to his brother but he was happy for him all the same.


Ludwig had decided what he was going to do and he would do it that night. But... it was not to be.


That night, the Pasta Kingdom was attacked by the evil Eyebrow Wizard. The wizard was cunning and devious and it was his goal to take over the kingdom. And every single time he tried, one of the Princesses would find themselves in danger. Lovino had already escaped the evil wizard but Feliciano was yet to run. The Eyebrow Wizard had him cornered and he stated that once he had taken the Princess, he could use him to rule the Kingdom. Feliciano was utterly useless at fighting so he tried to run and escape but he failed. The wizard cackled and Feliciano closed his eyes as the wizard reached out for him. Fearing this was the end, Feliciano cowered in fear but the wizard never attacked. Instead, he was greeted with a rather unmanly yelp of pain and the princess opened his eyes to see the wizard land hard on the ground. Feliciano looked over at his saviour and smiled brightly.


The Pasta King was grateful towards Ludwig for saving his Princess. He told the youngest prince that he could have whatever he wanted as thanks. Ludwig knew what he wanted; he knelt down on one knee and asked for Feliciano's hand in marriage. Of course the Princess said yes and the Pasta King gave his blessing immediately.


And like most fairytales you can be sure that this one ended happily ever after.